and you're done.

A poem about eternity that didn't last.
by melissa patino



nevermore will i seek you,
my old friend i can not meet you.
you were bad enough to string me along
you broke my heart for way too long.

i asked you not to tell me,
then you forced it apon me.
i cried for days
now i only feel hate.

forget you now
forget you later
forget me for that purpose, greater
the second i forget you,
you wrote me a letter.

my heart is on my sleeve
my fault, as i am easy to please
as i pleased you for too long
my fault for stringing you along.

good luck
i take it back
maybe you will fall and crack
till then old friend
i will never see you again.

- MP

madelieine peyroux

Lyrics to Half The Perfect World :
Every night he’d come to me
I’d cook for him, I’d pour his tea
I was in my thirties then
Had made some money
Lived with men

We’d lay us down to give and get
Beneath the white mosquito net
And since no counting had begun
We lived a thousand years in one

The candles burned
The moon went down
The polished hill
The milky town
Transparent, weightless, luminous
Uncovering the two of us
On that fundamental ground
Where love’s unwilled, unleashed, unbound
And half the perfect world is found

The candles burned
The moon went down
The polished hill
The milky town
Transparent, weightless, luminous
Uncovering the two of us
On that fundamental ground
Where love’s unwilled, unleashed, unbound
And half the perfect world is found

love you.

Snow Days

Texas has been having some wacky weather... I had the last two days off due to the ics and sleet all over the DFW metroplex. What did I do?! Have a Dexter Marathon day! Drank warm tea, and enjoyed my extra weekend, in the middle of the week!

love,
Lala

Single and Sick

no fun. no fun to make your own tea, to make your own bed, to take yourself to the doctor. no fun to guess if you have a fever with your own hand, and turn on the movie by yourself and watch it by yourself, and take your medicine by yourself, and make a yucky face by yourself. no fun.
this year, i vow not to get sick again. it's bad enough i feel ugly and tired and coughing all over the place, i don't have anyone to tell me i'm still amazing.
now that i'm feeling better i'm already starting to take it for granted. i still have 5 more days of antibiotics. and i'm thinking that vitamins don't taste great enough to take everyday. will i feel back to "normal" soon. and why did i get sick in the first place? :( playing in the cold and staying up late, not drinking enough water, and defo not sleeping well. stress. yes, i have stress. not sure why. i think it's gone now. i forgot what i was stressed about. maybe it was my yo bro and sis' visit that made me go crazy. and work, that's never a walk in the park. most importantly... single. single = stress? only when you have to make dinner for one. LOL

love,
miss lala

Girl Talk

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."
— Marilyn Monroe

Last weekend I went to a concert for a DJ/band called Girl Talk. It was so much fun. Jess, Amanada, Richard and I danced all night long. We had a bet that the person who stops dancing first would wash our cars in swimsuits. So, I promise, we didn't stop, not even when we were downing our waters did we stop. Since all four of us are winners, no cars were washed.

On Saturday my work buddy, JR called me to inform me of some tragic news. Our India co-worker has died. Letter from another collegue about Raphaels death:
Raphael just spoke to me on Saturday morning and left so thrilled to go and play a practice match with the Microsoft Soccer team. He loves all kinds of Sports and has been waiting for this day to join the team. Within 3 hours after he left, i got a call stating he is serious and somebody needs to rush to the hospital. His family stays in a diffrent city and it takes them atleast 6-8 hours to reach Bangalore.
As per his friends who were playing with him, he took a break while playing stating he was feeling tired and just wants to sit out a bit. The guys continued playing and when they were done with the match and walked up to him before leaving, he was sitting there motionless. They rushed him to the hospital but was declared dead on arrival.
Raphael was 29 years old, he was sweet and kind. RIP Raphael. You will be missed.

p.s. a little venting, my manager didn't even have the respect to approach the DM team about his death. Nor did she say a single word to us all day. And throughout the day when other co-workers were asking where did Raph go... WE had to tell them the devistating news. I did collect my 3 co-worker in the morning for a moment of silence. (they said they are not religious, i told them, you dont' have to be religious to stay quite for 30 seconds).

Right now, I'm just living day to day... Nothing special is happening, and nothing exciting. But please tell the ones you love, that you love them. And live everyday as happy as you can be. You never know.

much love,
Melissa Patino

Lala's Dancer Body

Yesterday I took pictures of myself in the mirrow for before pictures... and man, I should have taken then 3 days before (when I was bloated) becauase I'm not fat. I'm just not tight in the areas that I want to be. This is a picture of me at a Tiesto concert four years ago. I was a ripe and beautiful at age 23 or maybe I'm 24 in this picture. Super tight abs, and a beautiful dancer body. This is my goal to get to by Valentines weekend. I have written up a planner and will hopefully stick to my new routine.
Much Love,
me

My blueberry nights

the other day, i swore off love. i actually said "i no longer love, love" and a peice of my heart fell off. a hole in my heart. many friends are going thru a bad time right now, and i've lost faith in love. i didn't want to be patient. "time heals all wounds" is what my cousin told me, i'm thinking "this isnt' a WOUND! this is an infection taking over my body, my brain. and it hurts."
This last weekend was New Years. It use to be my most favorite holiday because the pressure of the last three months are finally released. I can drink and be merry and not worry about anyone else, just me. I loved throwing NYE parties. Everyone would come to my house, and meet new friends thru my other friends. It was awesome. I think I'll do that for next year.
So, back to the love thing... Yesterday I spend the day with myself. I had a good time being lazy and watching movies and baking, and playing with the kitty cat (house sitting for my aunt while she's on her cruise). The last movie I watched was called My Blueberry Nights. It stars Norah Jones, who was recently broken hearted due to boyfriend going out with another girl. She goes to the dinner where she meets Jude Law and ends up finding comfort in him as a friend. After a year of searching for a distraction (she can't get her ex-boyfriend off her mind) she comes back to NY and ends up with Jude Law. I'm not really that good of a story teller I missed a lot, but either way, the most important part is where I tell you that yes, I'm back in love with love. Because the feeling is undiscribable. I just hope someday I feel like that again.
Much love,
me